My Diary 14.

Today I have been a transported baby. Daddy took me to the previously mentioned car boot sale where I received several new toys including a xylophone. Next I played with Mummy before travelling to church in my bicycle seat. Daddy didn't pedal hard enough so I had to kick him in the back. Fwah hah hah. My friend T was in church so we played together. Most unfairly I had the seat side of the pew so he had it much easier when it came to dropping toys and making a noise. Eventually I persuaded Mummy to take me to drive the Church Ferrari. One choc chip biscuit and lots of admiration later it was back into the bike seat and zoming home. I passed T being wheeled home in his buggy and gave him a lordly wobble of the head.

All that fresh air made me tired so I napped till lunch (fruit cocktail and a yoghurt) then embarked on a strenuous play session with Mummy and Daddy. Wore Mummy out so went for a buggy ride to the park. Played on the swings then droped off on the way home.

Not sure what's going to happen about bedtime yet. Surely they can't be thinking of cancelling my breast privileges altogether. No. That would never happen.

In summary: today I've ridden in a car, a cute car, on a bike and in my buggy. A wheely good day so far. (That, fellow babies, is called a pun.)

A weekend meeting

Some excitement last Saturday. We went to a gathering - O fortunate people to be related to a J. Lots of cousins, the WGAs * were out in force and at the end, happiness, Wise Granny arrived. There was a buffet - lovely chewy bread, salmon, dips, carrots, strawberries and more. I tried to teeth on a stick of celery but that blasted front tooth still won't pop out.

A pleasant way to spend a day.

* WGA - Wonderful Great Aunts

A baby and a balloon

Happiness is hitting Mummy with a balloon. What a pleasant bonk bonk noise it makes.

Daddy and I had yet another Father-Son day today. We hit the toy shop (John Lewis). We looked at new (bigger) Chairs of Doom and I bought some new toys. We then went to a shop where I received a free balloon. Of course this was preferable to bought toys.

We also went through the cupboard and removed my 6-9 month clothes. My 6-9 month Baby vests have begun to burst asunder. Clothes Sellers - why aren't clothes sold in correct J sizes? As the most important Baby I demand correctly labelled clothes. Onto the 9-12 month Baby vests. Agoo.

I am also working on a tooth or two. Can one become addicted to Calpol? I hope not. Mine's a pint thank you.

Strange happenings

Got a good handful of fur on the mobile teddy today. It zoomed off then stopped and looked at me in an affronted fashion.

Things are strange at the moment. Mummy gives me first breakfast but then goes and hides until it is time for me to start going to bed. Not sure what's going on here.

On a happier note this is me on holiday. I am just having a little arm-and-leg-wave in a meadow in Spain. I have just had a lovely carry in Mummy's arms through a forest and am relaxing. Imagine that in the background Big Sis is squawking about cold water; her voice mingling with the roar of a waterfall (for untravelled babies: this is like a shower only bigger). There is a pleasant smell in the air. No wonder I'm smiling.

Jenga is not a good game for babies

A day of much exercise today - sitting practise, door bouncer, bike rides (with Daddy and Mummy). Meals - mostly baby glop but some yoghurts sneaked their way in and I enjoyed some biscotti.

Found set of new toys - they are called bricks. The idea is parents build a tower for you and you knock it down. The new bricks are also suckable. I think I like them.

Anonymous giggling

Apologies to anyone who has found a brief giggle on their answer-phone. It was Mummy and Daddy phoning people up and then tickling me.

Daddy got me out of bed today - straight to Baby Breakfast as second breakfast not third breakfast. I went out with Mummy so had to survive on breast milk. On return I tried potato, parsnip and cauliflowers. Proceed direct to blup, do not pass taste buds. Daddy tried it and though that it tasted like Brussels sprouts. Don't think that I want to try them then. Ate two yoghurts to try to wash the taste out of my mouth then a couple of Wotsits. Finished with some Baby Apple Juice from my Trainer Cup.

Spent time in my door bouncer. The dangling band was at just the right length so I could bounce myself, spin round etc. Cue gurgles of joy as I exchanged happy noises with Mummy.

Exhausted myself so early bed. Agoo all.

Returning after a short nap

My apologies infant comrades but not only have I been a very busy J but my internet access has been down.

A bullet point update:

Friday - relatively standard day - woke, ate, exuded cuteness, tried to chew Mummy. Food - Baby cereal, Baby rice (blair, yuck), pasta, tomato and ham (good for dyeing bib, clothes etc.) and strawberry and banana whip (yoghurt) - not convinced by this.

Saturday - emergency mission of mercy up to Grand parents. Baby of Morale required urgently. On arrival went straight into action reminding Cool Auntie and Wise Granny how much they enjoyed seeing me. They marvelled at my rolling - I showed them exactly how to do it then went on to demonstrate preliminary sitting. Eventually they peeled themselves away and went off to pick up Granddad and to do some shopping. I am now the proud owner of a cow cup. They also bought two new food stuffs - yoghurt and Jamaica Ginger Cake. Cool Auntie tried feeding me yoghurt. As you can see this was not a total success. Daddy gave me cake - mmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Sunday - back into routine - walked Mummy to church. Four foot wooden baby nowhere in sight; scared off. Admired by congregation then walked Mummy home. Daddy took me out for a walk and a go on the swings.

Monday - Early to rise means that a J can fit in an extra breakfast (time for Op WALLPAPER PASTE again). Baby swimming then took Mummy shopping. Decided halfway round Asda that I was not happy at all. Had to feed in car before the drive home. Ate apricot and apple and strawberry puree and inexpertly mashed butternut squash.

Tuesday - Teething again. Waaah. Took Mummy to the Babies and Mothers morning then on to a hospital appointment. Since it was for her I graciously slept through it. To pool, met with Big Sis and Daddy and enjoyed being taken for a zoom. Home, must let Daddy pick the menu more often - Pear Surprise and Jamaica Ginger Cake for supper. Wow. So full that didn't want much mashed potato. Bed, woke at midnight for reassuring feed then back to sleep again, secure in the knowledge of a job well done.

My Diary 12.

Following on rather rapidly from my previous entry which itself was slightly out of sequence because my tooth was clearly an extremely important event this is my diary to date.

Sunday. Church day. A day when a baby can count on a nice long suckle through the sermon; and occasionally through the peace and the creed as well. Wrong. Today Mummy did not sit with Daddy. Instead she was up front with a four foot long wooden baby called a bassoon. Priorities Mummy, priorities please. Fed after the service instead.

Drove my pushchair to and from the service accompanied by Daddy. I like my Maclaren. Lewis Hamilton watch out.

Ate a rusk, some baby cereal and had my tooth brushed for the first time. What fun!

Today I ate some Sunshine Baby cereal for breakfast and followed this with HIPP Pear Surprise. Another Granny discovery and equally delicious. Thank you. Then Baby swimming, a long feed and a shopping trip. I find that my baby carrier makes the trip feel far more civilised than when Mummy uses a trolley with "baby carrier". I am not a generic baby. I am J and therefore I am important. Also without me steering Mummy takes far too long.

Home. Mummy tried to tidy up. I delayed her fwahhah hah haha revenge for the shopping trip. Mummy's godmother and her mother came to meet me. I smiled at them and enjoyed bouncing on their knees but unfortunately I was too tired to be my normal enchanting self. Ate half rusk. Took nap. Bouncier after.

Supper - finished pot of pear surprise. Tried mashed New Potato. Not impressed although rather filled by pear surprise. Delivered Christian Aid leaflets then went to park. Back home, Daddy brushed my tooth then a suckle and sleep.

Good night fellow babies. Remember 1 am and 4am are for feeding not sleeping.

My Diary 11.

Apologies for the gap in postings - I took Mummy up to Granny and Granddad's on Friday and this tired us out.

I have met lots of new people. On Friday I visited C who works with Granny and very kindly lent us all sorts of equipment including the Chair of Doom. I gave her a special smile. I met Mummy's old childminder who was very nice when I wrote off her fruit bowl by tugging on a banana. I met Cool Aunty's godparents and had some lovely long cuddles. They had very kindly laid on a small child who, by bouncing up and down, had me in fits of laughter. Arrived to find that Granny had laid in some new baby food. I started with a rusk then tried HIPP sweet potato and chicken - average rating and HIPP mango surprise. Mummy says that she suspects that the surprise was that it was mildly alcoholic.

I was late to bed and couldn't even wake up for Granddad. The next morning I woke Mummy up early so I could say hello to him before he went to work. Granny made Mummy feed me some real mango. The first one that I tried didn't quite hit the spot but the second one was sweeter and went down nicely. I then followed this with some more sweet potato and chicken. After I had finished eating Mummy dressed me. She is learning. Slowly, it must be admitted, but learning nonetheless.

We then went on to Mummy's school reunion where I was much admired and photographed. We toured her school. While I was chewing on Mummy's hand she noticed a scratching and thus discovered my new tooth. We went to say goodbye to Granny; to gather my belongings and then it was into the Chair of Doom and back home.

My Diary 10.

With the sunnier weather I persuade Mummy to dress me in short sleeved baby gro so I could display even more cuteness to the world. Managed some long drinks to keep me well hydrated.

Activities:
Still working hard on my rolling - can almost reliably turn from back to front but seem to get stuck there. In pursuit of a fine level of baby fitness I spent so much time in my door bouncer that I became tired and hungry and needed a comforting cuddle, suckle and nap. Supervised Mummy tidying up; I have a V shaped pillow that props me up nicely.

Food:
Starving today. Ate 1/2 pot of beef hotpot followed by a rusk followed by some milk.
Mmmmm. Baby sunshine cereal. I liked this straight off and ate all of it and asked for more. This was not forthcoming so I made do with milk.

Smiling:
Mummy and Daddy, obviously.
After going for a walk I smiled at the Shop Lady. She does so appreciate my visits. I stand on the counter and grin. Sometimes I chuckle. It is so enjoyable doing things for the community.
I also smiled at everyone who came over to play Scrabble. I suspect this made their night.

A routine yet satisfying day. Agooo everyone.

My Diary 9.

Another day of enchanting cooing, gurgling and laughing. Another day of displaying my amazing physical prowess. Sometimes I really, really impress myself.

Went to "Mother and Baby Coffee Morning". Personally I think that this should be renamed "Baby and Milk Mother Morning" putting things in order of importance but I suppose this would probably confuse Mummy. Showed off my rolling - 50% of the time I can go from back to front. The other 50% of the time I get my arm stuck under me and end up slowly revolving while emitting little cries of effort.

Went swimming with Mummy then Daddy and Big Sis Joined me. Swam under water a lot. Discovered a problem with my Happy Nappy - when combined with the patent method of solo floating (foam tube under shoulder-blades) and kicky legs the buoyancy pushes my face underwater. Still was rescued and comforted so not all bad.

Took Mummy shopping - she bought me more rusks and nice baby food. She also bought some plastic nipples. I told you Mummy; I don't want anything to do with the plastic breast. She also bought some Baby Rice and Baby Juice. Why does everything I eat other than milk have Baby in front of it's name. Am I a cannibal? How do they make juice out of babies?

Finished day with 1/2 banana, 1 rusk and a nice long suckle.

My Diary 8.

Baby swimming today - I am getting the hang of the reaching forwards with the arms and was complimented on my "swimming" through the underwater hoop. This actually involves a firm push to the rear end but none the less the instructress complimented me on my swimming. Does this bode well for future careers I ask myself.

Knackered. Fed in changing room then slept in car. Woke up in sitting room.

Mummy, Daddy and I then went to a fete. The sun was shining and I was in my baby sling and wearing a jacket (I have finally grown out of my fluffy suits). I grew quite hot and was relieved when I was taken into the park for a sit down (stand up in my case). I noticed that a shape sorter was purchased for me. This rattles in an interesting way but is rather hard to suck.

In the afternoon I did some serious squirming and almost rolling onto my front. This exhausted me so I needed a restorative feed and power nap. I then woke up feeling cuter than ever.

More gym work - my arm keeps on getting stuck under me - then time for dinner. Starting to feel like the "Very Hungry Caterpillar". I ate a whole rusk, some avocado (not impressed by avocado) and finished the pot of Heinz Strawberry, peach and cream dessert. I washed down this impressive banquet with two breasts full of milk. Following this I produced my first post solids nappy. One face wash and complete change of clothes later it was time for bed.

Sleep well fellow babies.

My Diary 7.

Breakfasted on a banana and plenty of milk. Church this morning. Held out until the sermon but then needed to feed all through the peace. Such is life. Coffee and admiration afterwards then I was brutally changed into a Mickey Mouse outfit - dungarees and a top and hurried into the chair of doom and driven off to catch a boat.

Met up with Cool Auntie and permitted her to hold and talk to me. After the boat ride we took the train then walked up to Great Aunt's house. More people to play with me. The party was for my Great Granddad; I had carefully drooled on a card for him earlier this week. I was rather upset when everybody shouted "Surprise" and let off party poppers but Mummy hugged me back to happy again. I had a good chat with Great Granddad and was hugged by Great Grandma and my Godmother plus sundry other relations.

All too soon it was time to return to the boat - I slept on the train this time. I protested being stuck in my car seat but to no avail and eventually gave up in disgust and went to sleep.

I was woken by Mummy and fed a rusk - it is more fun when they are halved as they are then easier to eat - and some more Peach, Strawberry and Cream baby food. A final suckle then off to bed. Another busy day.

My Diary 6.

Another day spreading cuteness.

Pleasant walk in the morning with a chance to zoom down a slide and go on a swing.

Mummy and Daddy thought that there was a barbecue on at their friends'. Fine by me as they do a very nice line in J adoration. There was a BBQ but not today - it's tomorrow. We stayed for tea and I admired the trampoline. Watching small children bounce on it.... hilarious. Mummy wouldn't let me have a go so I persuaded Daddy to throw me up in the air instead.

I then went for a carry along the beech I am told - I slept through this. All that laughing tired me out.

We then went to visit my Godfather. He is funny as well. He has an accent that is called "Scottish" apparently. I had some quality cuddles, tickles and conversations. I also practised my rolling. At the moment I can almost roll onto my side but my arm gets stuck. Cue a lot of swearing (in baby).

Home - rusk and a trial of a new baby food - strawberry and apple dessert - not too bad but I prefer milk. Glug, glug, glug. Milky good night.

My Diary 4.

Many apologies for the recent hiatus - I have been extremely busy. On Sunday I tried mashed potato, mashed swede and ice-cream (mint Vienetta). I liked the mashed potato but all the others soon reappeared. I have also been fed Heinz Baby breakfast. Blech.

I have continued to investigate the round objects. Apparently they are called rusks. If sucked for long enough then they are edible although not as good as breast milk. They also have a slightly soporific effect - I have missed my 4am feed twice in the past three days.

Granny and Grandad came by for a visit yesterday. As you would expect I overwhelmed them with my charm. The also commented favourably on my hair - now in fluffy mohican mode; my strength; my smile; my standing and my general adorability. They brought me a hat. What ever happened to the extra breast for Mummy? I was not impressed by the plastic booby that Daddy tried to fob me off with last week.

I went to Baby swimming with Mummy on Monday and today went to the pool with Mummy, Daddy and sister. I have a pair of very stylish kicky legs and am getting the hang of the splashing thing.

My Diary 3.

Decided to take pity on my mother and go back to sleep at 7am. Cool Auntie gave me a teddy bear when I was born and Mummy put this in my cot. I knocked it over. Mummy jumped as it made a noise.

Fresh clothes today - a very stylish babygro saying Little Captain. Who says I only get clean clothes when I poo over them?

Daddy is groaning over the amount of work that he has to do so Mummy decided to take me out for a long walk. Daddy thought that this was a wonderful idea and walked with us to the swing park. I love the swings - I can go in them myself. I went on the slide too. There was a puddle at the bottom so I wasn't allowed to slide free but I prefer that to having a soggy bottom.

We walked for hours. I have grown so much that my fluffy suit doesn't fit so my legs were dangling out. Just as well we have nice weather. Arrived back, had restoring feed, nappy change and a break for some gym work. Daddy then took me out for a walk in my Maclaren. Returned, fed then helped my Mummy play Scrabble.

Books read today - "Beep, Beep, Let's Go!"; "Squirrel Nutkin",

Books chewed today - "Beep, Beep, Let's Go!"

My Diary 2.

Out of bed early but then went to sleep in Daddy's arms and snored. Loudly.

Mummy decided to walk to church with me in the sling and I managed to hold out until the sermon despite the second reading (1 Peter 2:2) making me very hungry. After the service I charmed a few people and ate then skilfully steered Mummy home again. This was very tiring work so I went to sleep on the way back. Mummy got us back OK; I really ought to give her more credit for knowing what she's doing.

I then napped through lunch. Thankfully it was waiting for me when I woke up. Embarked on an intensive exercise programme - stretches, crunches, gurgling, cooing and tried out my new door bouncer.

I then had a story, a few good feeds and finally asked to be put to bed.